Sunday, June 30, 2013

Moments of impact

Remember that scene from The Vow? Where the truck appears out of no where while Paige and Leo were in the car? Yeah, this scene literally happened before me 20 hours ago. In fact, I was actually in Paige's seat when that happened and thankfully I only pulled a few veins and had some bruises instead of flying out of the windscreen, going into coma and losing my memories.

20 hours ago, after sending the part-time house cleaner back with my mum, I went to get my daily Starbucks fix at the mini airport near where I stay. I go there so often that I am proud to say that I am mayor on Foursquare at that Starbucks and that the baristas there knows my usual and my name without asking. "You're the only person who would ask for low-fat milk but with extra whipped cream."  I left right after collecting my frappuccino and heated up banana muffin. We then went to our usual mamak store to take away dinner. This is how my family lives, these are just part of our daily routines that we do without fail, every single day. 

After getting the 2 packs of fried noodles, we drove back home. It wasn't a long drive, there wasn't any traffic, it would only take us a 5 minutes drive back home. I remember it all, clearly. We were at the T-junction that we had to drive through to get into my neighbourhood. Our car stopped right behind a car at one of the traffic lights, waiting for our turn to drive. I could even remember the conversation that my mum and I were having. The traffic light turned from red to green and my mother released the brakes and started driving again, tailing the car that was in front of us. We were the second car in line."If you are able to indulge in the bitterness of coffee in it's purest form, you can endure any bitterness in life." Those were the last words that I heard from my mum.

The flashing headlights, the loud honks, the screech and everything else. It all happened in a blink of an eye, it happened so quickly that I did not even realize what was happening. All that I could remember was what my mother was telling me and the bright lights coming from my mother's driver's window. You know that scene in movies where a super bright light just comes flashing in an accident? It was exactly like that. 

I'm not gonna lie and say that I could see my entire life flashing before my eyes when it happened. I'm not gonna lie that all that I saw was the ones that I loved before my eyes. Humans are selfish creatures who thinks about themselves first and I am one too. Truthfully, the first thought that came into my head was, "What the fuck just happened, am I dead?", nothing cliché like in the movies. For the first second after the crash, I literally saw a light and I could only remember myself muttering out shit. After that, I could not 
remember anything else but I was told that I fainted on the spot but my mum tried waking me up and after a few seconds, I woke up. 

It smelled of toxic air and smoke. The only thing that was in my head by then was to just get out from my seat. I started by getting the air bag that was already out and the safety belt away. I tried pushing the door open but it wouldn't bulge. Images from movies where cars explode from car crashes and all suddenly came and I tried pushing the door harder (I freaked out and thought that the car would explode too. Hey, don't blame me for watching too many movies.), I then manage to get out from the small creak. My mum got out later than me but she still manage to get out from the damaged vehicle. 

People started stopping. Cars were driving by slowly and a few motorcyclists came and helped us. A woman helped me get to the pavement by the road. I settled down and I suddenly had images of all the people and things that I cherish flashed right in front of my eyes. A little too dramatic but these were all true. After awhile, the pain started sinking in. My back and my neck were aching like hell. My legs were sore and my chest felt like it was from fire, I had difficulties with breathing. Not only that, my hands were literally ice cold and I could not feel my left hand at all. That was when everything started making sense. I survived a huge car crash, okay. I somehow mange to get out of the car, okay. My mother and I are safe but the whole car is literally destroyed into a piece of junk, okay. I am not bleeding, I am having breathing difficulties, okay. Everything seemed alright to me since nobody were hurt but then I was asking myself why couldn't I feel my hand at all. 

My vision and thoughts were all still scattered. I turned to the left and saw the car that crashed into us. I heard the man cursing and saying something like, "Why are you even driving?! You're a woman, go home!" to my mother. I tried getting up to help out but my legs were as wobbly as jello. My hands were hopeless and so was I at that moment. That was when all the feelings of fear and panic kicked in, that was when I started crying for I don't even know what reason. 

The motorcyclists who witnessed everything then started helping my mum and calming me down. They contacted the police and then contacted my dad and brother. The man from the other car continued cursing at both my mother and I. Why were we getting cursed at for no reason when we did nothing wrong? Why were we getting blamed when we were the one that was clearly the victim? My father and brother got there within 5 minutes. The medic and the police started arriving too. I was then sent to the hospital to get treated. 

By the time we reached the hospital, I could feel nothing but pain from my left hand. I was sent to the emergency section of the hospital and I had to get x-rayed immediately. The wait for the scans to come out felt like it took forever. While waiting, I had to take pain killers because the pain that I felt all over were already unbearable. The scans came out all fine although my left hand was so swollen that it looked like it had doubled up it's normal size. The doctor than told me that my muscles had tighten up from the shock and that I pulled a few veins. My mum on the other hand had no injuries. 

These are the first-hand account on the car accident that happened to my mum and I 20 hours ago. These are the things that nobody knew would happened 20 hours ago. These are the things that would've taken both my mum and my life away within seconds. These are the things that have made me realize that I have been given a second chance in life to make me cherish, appreciate, love and give more than I can receive in life. These are the events will leave a ripple effect and I will forever remember until that day I go. These are the moments of impact on this 16 years old. 

written on the 29th of June, 4pm.

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